Take Two
I’m not someone to write an entire page, crumple it up and throw it away. But today, I just about titled this “take two” because that’s exactly what I did. I had re-read last year’s recap first and it felt like too much of the same.
Maybe it was. Maybe I did repeat the year, less or more.
That’s the funny thing about habits, rituals, routines and even client rosters: they can start to all feel the same if you’re not intentional about it.
I also simply started moving too fast so I wouldn’t have time to slow down and notice. As a consequence, it took me 4 months and 5 days to even sit down and write this.
Why?
I don’t think I could face it. I needed more time, but I also had chosen distraction over reflection. And these recaps require the utmost reflection.
I can’t talk about 2025 without talking about the fact that it was the first year without my brother. He passed away on New Year’s Eve 2024, which meant that the entirety of 2025 was without him.
We buried him. I designed his headstone. But he was gone.
I worked so much and planned the craziest of trips so I didn’t have to think about that fact too much. Just for today to roll around and for me to feel the yearning of writing it all down.
So, I write.
Lessons learned
The strongest of grief can go unseen
I flew to Palm Springs 7 days after the funeral. This wasn’t for vacation, but for a very high-end networking event with one of our clients (Kindred if you know it). I had originally talked to my brother about going. And now he was gone. A handful of people knew what had happened. The rest were totally in the dark. Part of that was my doing. How could I share what happened if I hadn’t totally yet processed it?
It was like living in two dimensions at once: dining and talking with some of the world’s top artists while knowing that my own world had just shattered. I didn’t break down until the very end when the spoken word book-end to the event ripped me open. I cried. I cancelled my optional attendance to the final day’s excursion and flew back home (technically back to Utah and not to Texas to spend another month with my grieving family). Amy did the same after losing her dog in a tragic accident.
We definitely ate cake and cried together in my hotel room. That was healing.
AI didn’t take my job (yet)
One day, I really hope I’ll look back and laugh at this idea. I hope I’ll think it was silly. The reality, though, is that AI did fill a need. We used to be the one people would call if they wanted great writing. They would ask us, “Can you edit this? Can you make this sound more luxurious without saying the word luxury? Can you weave a story into this page?”
With AI, people can type those same ideas into a chatbot and get an immediate answer (not the very human reply that can take a few hours or a couple of days).
It has definitely been satisfying to see how much people care about their words, and the extent they’ll go to perfect them. However, things definitely slowed down for a while in 2025. I wasn’t sure if it was the economy, AI or just a summer simmer. Perhaps it was all three.
I would joke to my friends, “If AI takes my job, maybe I’ll write for fun again.” This comment cut me every time I said it to be honest.
The good news: things picked back up (perhaps even with more interest than before). The bad news: I’m still not writing for fun (although, a good coastal project does the trick for me).
Events made me feel both light & heavy
Previously, traveling for events was always freeing for me. Last year, all I wanted to do was have my routine at home and do nothing else. It really started to feel gut-wrenching leaving the house when I technically can do my entire job from home. To note: I wasn’t in my own home or state for about 6 months while my brother fought cancer, and then for his funeral. Home became a bit of a sanctuary I didn’t want to leave.
Irish music will make me cry
The Manolo Blahnik shoes aren’t worth it – wore em once and now they sit in my closet like they’re too nice to wear (maybe I’ll feel otherwise another time)
March in Texas is the best time of year
You’re never too late to have a bachelorette party
Plan a vow renewal (or a wedding) if you want your loved ones to go to Europe with you at the same time
The beach is always a good idea
I won’t go to many places twice, but I will to Sorrento (and I did)
Renting a boat in Prague with your best friends – yes please
Wins
- I kept going. Sometimes I leaned a little too hard into work, but I kept going.
- I always listen closely to what my clients say and love to find applications for my own life. One of our clients raved about pilates and my best friend ended up inviting me to go to class with her in February. I’ve been going 3-4x a week (on average and unless I’m traveling) ever since and it’s made me stronger physically and mentally. My brother loved working out and this feels like the healthiest coping mechanism ever.
- I took the hard trips. One of those was going back to Utah (thankfully with my sister) for the first time since the funeral. The other was a sibling trip to the beach we grew up on. The last one was back to Utah alone to pick out a headstone with my parents.
- I was the Master of Ceremonies for the third year in a row at the Fort Worth Business Plan Competition
- I hosted my entire family for Christmas
- I was asked to be a bridesmaid!
Will do
- Write for fun?
- Archive my brother’s poems (get them printed and bound)
- Travel more for me and less for work
- Only take on projects with people who see us, and who we can’t wait to write for
- Notice my city
- Pour into myself
Salt in the wild
Enjoy my finds of salt in the everyday with a few official Salted appearances.
May 5, 2026
